Melbourne is Calling (Part-4) - Things we did before stepping foot in Australia !!

        You can read our other parts of migration experiences here 

       I remember reading somewhere that it takes 5 years to completely settle down into a new country. Considering that statement our migration is a just started "process". Well, a job well begun is half done.Our first trip to Melbourne was overwhelmingly successful. 

        Precap: We are a couple from India, living in Singapore for 5 years now and one fine morning, back in 2013, we decided to migrate for many reasons. We chose Australia because it was a safe bet. But we've never been to Australia in our lifetime until we got our PR. 

        Here we are are, after our first landing, done with validating our visa. We really can't wait to make the permanent move from Singapore to Melbourne which will be around first quarter of next year.

        I will be covering the whole journey of our first entry to Australia in 3 posts. The first one being this- Things we did before our first landing. The second being (Part 5)- Things we did during and after our first landing, and the third being (Part 6)- our various experiences in Melbourne. 

        There is not a definite guideline to follow in this process. What works for us may not work for everyone. I know friends who did a better job than what we did. This is just our experiences. If any of you could benefit from any of this we are more than happy. Any suggestions or alternatives, readers please do enlighten us. 

         RESEARCH: Research is the word. It is an essential, mandatory, absolutely necessary process. All we could do sitting in Singapore before first landing was to think/ research/ plan. So that is exactly what we did, research about the following things.

        

1) Book the Flight Tickets & Accommodation:

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        Early is the new late. We booked our flight tickets 106 days early and almost for free. Arvind is a frequent flyer to US. So we had flyer miles loaded in his Krisflyer account which was about to expire this October. So replace miles for money and all we had to pay was few hundreds for the round trip. It is always book early and save big. And we stayed in Swanston Street, Melbourne CBD.

2) Get the documents ready:

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        I may sound old school, but when I step out of the house, I always carry a diary. And if it is a vacation, I take a file along with all the documents printed including itineraries, photocopies of passports, visas, passport photos and the schedule. I personally believe in hard copies and treat e-copies always an alternative. Hard copies are just difficult to destroy, does not vanish easily and more than anything, it documents memories.

        But all we needed to validate our visa at the immigration counter of Melbourne was just our passport. They did not even look at our visa papers. That is how much upgraded they are.

3) Luggage:

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         The original plan was to pack and ship all the stuffs only during our permanent move. But we did not want to waste the 100 kg allowance offered by the airlines - one of the perks of being a Krisflyer Elite gold member. And all thanks to Karthik & Babu- who offered us to drop our luggage at the Airport and A & S, a very generous couple in Melbourne who we made friends with. Thanks to the blog community. They offered to accommodate our luggage at their place in Melbourne temporarily for few months.  

4) Bank:

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        Again, Research is the word. Australia is a continent and Singapore is a small country. That is how much the difference is when it comes to gaining knowledge and expertise in any subject. Nothing comes and knocks the door like it always does in Singapore. When there is a change in anything, let it be banking, taxation, contracts, bills, even mobile plans, you get a letter and it gets automatically upgraded in Singapore. May be, the maximum you have to do is to make a call. But that is not the case in Australia, at least to my understanding.

        The one key thing to keep in mind is, it is not just us migrating, our money is migrating too. So the bottom line of the research, (definite mention to few friends who shared information) is we chose NAB isaver- a special account for migrants, which has the following benefits. Zero Account fees, application from overseas (personal identification required to activate the account), great advantage of no monthly fees, a generous 4 % P A interest rate(promotional rate), great internet banking services, and one last most important factor- security.
PS: For one way money transfer from any international account, (preferably DBS if Singapore, because of the great exchange rates) no activation of the isaver account is required.

5) Mobile Sim:
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        All we need was a Australia number which also has international roaming (basically Singapore, US, India), no roaming charges for incoming calls, nominal/usual charges for outgoing calls, free text message, maximum validity, prepaid service- so no bill shock, and online credit top up. And one sim ticked all our boxes,with few more perks too. Thanks to the Prepaid Travel Sim +.
And what do you do when there is a promotional ALDI prepaid sim for 5 $ with 5 $ credit? You buy that too.

6) Plan and print the schedule:
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        The final step before the trip- Print the schedule, day by day, if possible hour by hour. And we were all set to go.

PS: Though we did make maximum effort in all this, we could not have accomplished everything this successfully without friends help. Strangers became friends. Friends became close friends. Be it sharing info or offering to accommodate luggage or cheering us and giving hope, we got all the help we could ever imagine. Special mention to A & S, Subha, Margaret, Charles, Chris, Priya, Felix Choo, Karthik, Babu, Pooja and definitely our migration agent AIMS.

        I strongly believe in Karma. We would definitely want to repay/give back. So any fellow migrants who is need of any help regarding migration related issues feel free to contact us. We will be happy to help in all possible cases.

Stay tuned for next two parts :) Cya soon !!

Money Management to Migrate (Part-3)

You can read our previous parts of migration experiences here. 

Migration means 2 things.

1. Patience

2. Money, Lots of Money

Not a pro in both. But I really try. At least I'm closer than I was yesterday.

Learning money management starts at home. I look back at my childhood and I couldn't be taught more.

What my Father taught me:

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1. Never ever LEND money. Lend money only if you don't expect it back.

2. Never ever BORROW money. Period.

What my Mother taught me:

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Oh! So many things from compulsory savings to radical budget.

They never gave me a single lecture on money management. Their actions did more than any lectures.

Its 4 years now I've started to handle money on my own. And I was terrible with it. Oh! God knows!   I loved useless crap.

Same cut dress in 4 different colors?? - Yes, Please!!

Sandals that I won't / can't even use?? - Add to bag!!

A book just because its cover page is red?? - Totally!!

A coffee mug just because I want to reach the count of 20 mugs?? - Can't stop!!

Now I look back, all I have is too much of guilt and possession of more useless crap. Yeah I ended it eventually and I have to. Saving money just works like dieting. Losing weight or getting rich- Both not gonna happen in one day.

Here are few tips, we follow.

1. Savings account that we can't access:

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        When I want something, I definitely want it. And when I handle the money, I easily buy it. And Arvind never says no to anything I buy. So the first job was to make Arvind strict towards me. The second job- we started a account where it requires both of us to withdraw/ transfer. So all my needy list goes through Arvind and the useless crap gets filtered out.

2. Be a Cheap Date:

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        Do not try this when you date, before marriage or even after few months of marriage. Once the glamour part is gone, when it is comfortable and familiar seeing the partner after a tiring sleep or walking around the house with night dress, that is the best time to take this step. 

A SWEETHEART is milk, A BRIDE is butter, A WIFE is cheese, as someone rightly said.

        Think creative. A carpet, some cheap wine, battery operated fairy lights/ a candlelight, homemade gobi manchurian and watching Friends can be as romantic as an expensive date. The best part is you feel the same and maybe a bit more proud saving few bucks.

PS: Don't be a cheapskate too. When the wife feels to dress up and go out, please do so. 

3. Cut down eating out:

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        Though I love cooking, I can't handle if its 24X7. We eat out a lot, like 4 days a week. Then we challenged ourselves to eat outside only twice a month and failed miserably. So we formulated a new plan, to start slow and now its eat outside once a week. Draw a plan which will work out, stick to it and it just feels great. 

4. Pay your bills, Pay your Savings too:

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         Treat your savings like a bill. At a particular date a large chunk of money automatically goes into our savings account. Its non negotiable. This way money adds up real soon. 

Do not save what is left after spending, but spend what is left after saving- Warren Buffet.

5. Make a Pact:

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        I started a no-spend August. But mid week I stapled my finger unfortunately and ended up crying all day. Convincing me became so tough for Arvind and eventually he ended up buying 2 gowns for me. So again its no-shopping September. I've taken a vow not to buy anything that isn't food or household or transport related.

PS: Don't beat yourself too much. At least you have to keep yourself alive and happy.

6. Cut back movies:

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        Every Friday is a compulsory night out. Its there in our family rules. Staying home at Friday nights, I literally feel like I am being punished. We used to go to meaningless movies, just for the pleasure of popcorn and coke. So Arvind switched the household shopping schedule to Friday nights. Its a win-win. 

        1st and 3 rd Fiday nights- House hold shopping. 2 nd and 4 th Friday nights- Movies.

So all Fridays are a night-out and the family rules are obeyed too.

        All these are nothing new and I am not an expert too. Just few things we follow. It is not always easy. But it's completely worth it. After all these years, if we don't learn to manage money, the future will make us learn in a hard way. And that is not the risk we wanted to take.

Happy Saving !! 

Second Anniversary @ Ko Samui- Sandy toes & Salty kisses !

Ko Samui- Another place ticked off our travel bucket list. This place was our long-time dream. We planned to spend our honeymoon here, went Genting instead. Then the first anniversary and went Bali instead. This time we made sure not to miss this, as this is one of the few last trips from Singapore and so we booked the tickets 3 months early.

So as usual, this vacation started with duty free shopping at Changi Airport. It was just an hour-long flight to Ko Samui from SG. We stayed at the Nora Beach Resort in Chaweng area. The next day, we explored the area, booked our tour tickets at kiosk, tried the local cuisine and relaxed at beach. We planned 5 days for sight-seeing and 4 days to just calm down and relax.

Koh Tao & Koh Nanguan : The Perfect escape to Paradise:

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            All set with hat, sunscreen, towels and sunglasses, the high speed boat departed for Koh Tao. Koh Tao- The Turtle Island is blessed with beautiful bay and beaches and has spectacular coral reefs along its shoreline. It’s a paradise for snorkelers and divers. We did all the snorkelling like it was the last day in the world. After lunch we left for Koh-Nanguan. This Island is considered one of the beautiful islands in the world where 3 islands are connected with sandy beach. There was an option to hike up to viewpoint. But it was more than breath-taking at the beach. So we spared the hard hill climbing and sweating for some beach time. Thus ended our day 2, at this beautiful island.

The Full day Safari:

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            This was the most tiresome day in the vacation. The day started with 4x4 jeep ride. We did elephant trekking, experienced elephant massage, elephant shows, monkey shows, visited the Grandfather Grandmother Rocks(Also known as Hin Ta & Hin Yai), The Mummified Monk, The Big Buddha Temple, The Tanim Magic Garden, The Secret Waterfalls and hiked up all the way up to Namuang Waterfalls.

The Tree Top View- Welcome to Safari Massage:

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            After lunch, we started to the highest view point of Ko Samui on a 4X4 Mountai Jeep. This was the most adventurous road travel we’ve ever done so far. Bouncing over the rocks through the dirt paths, few throw ups here and there, few doses of adrenaline rush, we finally reached the viewpoint which was all worth it. To see Ko Samui with all its beaches, it was just spectacular. The best view ever seen so far.

Ang Thong National Marine Park @ The Anniversary Day:

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            These are group of 42 limestone islands encircled by coral bands and are surrounded by shallow water edged by secluded beaches, covered with evergreen forest and a wide range of flora & fauna.

Kayaking – PANIK !

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            At PhiPhi, Phuket, it was all canoeing and there was a Canoe guide who did all the canoeing for us. Here it was wilder than I did imagine. We both were first time kayakers and the feeling was more than nervous, Scary !. There were around 20 other couples (sure not first timers), kayaked with much ease and seeing them made us believe, that it was a real easy adventure. It was our turn, with all the nervousness and discomfort we were seated in the kayak.

            In spite of all the explanations, videos, instructions and lifejackets, I turned panic. A rush of faces passed in my mind. Though very near to our boat, it was in the middle of a sea and I made Arvind even more panic. The whole group was waiting for us in a direction and we were rowing the other direction. I rowed left, Arvind rowed right. The few others in the boat shouted and waved us to turn. I cried for help. Arvind tried to calm me down. We were a total mess. Few minutes later we figured and finally reached the group. Unfortunately we were taken in a long route and we had to kayak through 4 beaches. Others did it with much perfection and ease, enjoying the view and playing with each other. We had to sync our rowing. As Arvind was seated back he was the captain of our kayak, he instructed left right and to sync with him, I shouted left right with him. It was more like a march fast. It was too much of melodrama played by us.

More Kayaking- More PANIK !!

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            Somehow we crossed 2 beaches (not to mention, there was a lifeguard kayak following us all the time after all this drama I made). When I was about to break my kayak ladle, thank heavens, we finally reached the 4^th beach. (Can’t describe the Joy !!).

            We hiked up the to see the Maekoh Island- A Fantastic view of the saltwater lake- Talay Nai and the Emerald Green Lagoon. Luckily, I had brought my most practical hiking shoes- The Crocs ! After lunch we left to Wua Ta Lap Island in a long tail boat. Couldn’t handle too much of adventure. So we never did the 500m hill hike to see the 48 islands from the top view point. We spent every hour in the crystal clear water, finning with the fishes. Thus ended this day of adventure.

            After such an active day, we weren’t bothered a bit for our anniversary evening celebs. All dressed up we were all set for the big dinner. The day was too much to take, but all worth it.

The Canopy Zipping Adventure:

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            This was absolutely the highlight of our trip. This was the longest zip line on Samui covering 780 meters with 8 Cables. We zipped through the jungle from platforms/treetops. Each treetop had a beautiful view of the Island. Cable 1 was for training. The platform 3 we could see 2 sides of Samui- Maenam and Lamai. The Platform 6 even had a waterfall.

            I posed for the camera with all smiles. But I screamed and cried out loud the entire time. I couldn’t slowdown at one platform and with all that speed I kicked a guide’s eye, as he was stopping me from hitting the tree at the platform. This made me realize one thing. I am a no fit for adventure. Later I picked up some expertise (or at least I thought so!) and finished the lines, as there was no other option to reach the end destination.  At the end of the day, no regrets! Except for hitting the eye.

Our Zipping Adventure Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXYAFKUeJY0

The Samui Crocodile Farm:

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            They had so many crocodiles of various sizes. It was home for many other animals too. Crocodiles cannot be really tamed and basically they are wild dangerous animals that can eat people. The head in the mouth trick was rather worrying and we prayed that it should not be the trainer last performance. The trainer himself prayed too! It was a true display of bravado. Nevertheless both the crocodile and snake show was thrilling, nerve wracking and exciting. I love animals and I wouldn’t say this animal abuse. After all, it seemed like the crocs were friendly with trainers.

The Bike and The Beach!

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            Samui is a beautiful Island with many long uncrowded sandy beaches. The only way to explore around the Island is to rent a bike. We rented a brand new Honda PCX 150 and toured all the beaches. After all we were in Samui! We stayed at Chaweng area. Though Chaweng beach area is so commercialized, we were able to enjoy the true beach experience as our resort had a private beach.

Lamai Beach: The very next beach to Chaweng. A Long beach with yellow sand and a very beautiful coast.

Crystal Bay: The mostbeautiful beach on the Island with white sand and crystal clear water.

Few other beaches are Bophut beach, Big Buddha Beach, Choengmon Beach, Maenam Beach- Each beach a unique experience.

Night Market @ the Bophut Fishermen Village:

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       Ofcourse, An Island vacation does not come to an end without a night market. Nothing gives me pleasure like a shopping bargain. So thus came an end to our 9 day vacation @ Samui.

Just one word- AWESOME !

Migration to Australia- (Part 2) - When the going gets tough only the tough gets going !

You can read our other parts of migration experiences here.

All this started 1.5 years back on Jan 2013.  Thanks to few friends who inspired us to take this huge step. It’s been a roller-coaster ride so far. Also many thanks to our immigration specialists AIMS – Things wouldn't be this easy without them.

Migration- Pure Rocket Science:
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Of all the other things like money, qualification etc needed for migration, the most important thing is PATIENCE. 

Step 1- Do we qualify ?

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The very first step is meeting the basic eligibility criteria. Thanks to our young age, our master’s degree and Arvind’s years of work experience.  And now comes the money. Forget the second part of migrating over to the country, Just to get the Permanent Residence for a family of two, it costs around 15000 Sg $ approx (inclusive of the agents fee). Again Thanks to Singapore money, for making it affordable. After all this is an investment.

            So with choosing the visa category, satisfying the points test, going through with IELTS, (not whining about the preparation for the exams as it all ended good), and the next step was skills assessment.

Step 2- Getting ready with the docs:

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            This was the most tedious step. Apart from Birth certificates, Education certificates, marriage cert, passports, we needed Service certs from all companies, bank statements from all banks, salary certs, letter of recommendations from all bosses of all companies, letter of resignations, letter of appointments, transcripts, medium of instruction certs, etc.. What more and what not?

            In Our case, we had to collect all these from India too, troubling our parents and friends back at India.

Step 3- Skill Assessment

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            Everyone who applies for a visa subclass 189/190 have to encounter this step. Simply put, the migration department of Australia evaluates the worthiness of our work experiences (to Australia standards) to offer us a Permanent Residence Visa. For this, they require us to write a CDR (Competency Demonstration Report) – A minimum 25 page report, listing all the work experiences detail for all the companies we’ve worked.

            The good part is, only the primary applicant has to submit the CDR and so for Arvind, he had 4 years work experience at 3 different companies. So it was 3 chapters in total accessed by EA (Engineers Australia).

PS: Now with India becoming a permanent member of Washington Accord, there is a rumor that the Indian engineering graduates may not have to go through this. But this remains a rumor till now.

Step 4- Submitting EOI and PATIENTLY WAIT, VERY PATIENTLY WAIT:

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            So After a wait of 14 weeks, the results of CDR Assessment came in leaving way for the next step.

            Submitting EOI (Expression of Interest) is basically filling up all the forms including the IELTS, Skills assessment results, submitting it and waiting for the invitation rounds to get an invite. This is the crucial part, as it may take upto 2 years (max) to get an invite. The invitation rounds are conducted twice a month. Each and every midnight of first and third Sunday was a sleepless night for us for about 7 months.

Step 5- YAYY! The Invite:

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            After a worthy anxious wait of 7 months, we were finally given the invite, allowing us to proceed with medical and police clearance. Though for the Police clearance we had to get from both India and Singapore. The end was not far.

Step 6- The Permanent Residence – The Great Escape:

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            Here we are, smiling with the granted visa. Thanks to our extremely supportive parents, AIMS, and all others who helped us in this journey. Words will never describe this Joy. Now that the seemingly hard part is over, can’t wait to migrate and start a relaxed calm, peaceful life in Australia. Of course with few fast races here and there.

After all what is life without UPS and DOWNS! J

NOTE: The whole migration process may vary from person to person, family to family. There is no least or max time. It depends on various parameters like points, age, qualification, nationality etc.

Sharing Our Timeline Below:

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Occupation Code     :     233411 Visa 189

9 MARCH 2013       :      IELTS Exam Written

21 MARCH 2013     :     IELTS Results Acquired

         8.5                  :     IELTS Band Score

27 JULY 2013          :    CDR Approved

7 AUGUST 2013      :    EOI Submitted

24 MARCH 2014      :    Received Invite

2 APRIL 2014          :    PR Application Lodged

23 APRIL 2014         :    Medicals Completed

14 MAY 2014           :    Case Officer Assigned

15 MAY 2014           :    Police Clearance Applied

21 MAY 2014           :    PC Received (India)

5 JUNE 2014            :    PC Received (Singapore)

9 JUNE 2014            :    Form 18, Medicals and PC Submitted

10 JUNE 2014          :    Visa Granted (happens to be our wedding day at 2012 :) )

PS: Not making this a very vague post, listing all the details, providing the links etc. This is just a go-through post to understand the overall Process.

Migration to Australia- (Part 1) - When the going gets tough only the tough gets going !

Disclaimer: This blog post is not a guide for migration or an advertisement. This is purely based on our experiences and my understanding, written by me.
Thanks to few friends and family who inspired us to do this. Everyone has been a great source of inspiration, guidance and information for the past 1 year guiding us through each and every process. 

You can read our other parts of migration experiences here.

Precap: We both did Bachelors of Engg @ India, met at a conference. We fell in love, landed in Singapore,  did masters at NTU, got married, moved to 3 different houses, and here we are with the Australia Permanent Residence in hand - all ready for the next big step.

Why Migrate:

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A) From India:

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We are born and bred Indians. We love India and India is our first home. Having said that, coming to practical reasons, it’s not just money or career or the standard of living, it’s a loss of faith. Of course Arvind and I have had an awesome childhood in India. But to me have that childhood, my parents were in constant fear protecting me 24/7. They never did allow me alone to a shop nearby. I have traveled very few times in a local bus/train and have experienced many atrocities those few times. I was never allowed a night out/ sleep over with friends, nor a movie at theater with friends, unless it is a huge group, where the whole group is known to my parents individually or the whole group is guarded by one of the parent. I am sure many of the girl children would have experienced the same.

Now this is not just pampering, but it was all about protecting. And these days no matter how many good things are spotted, the bad things get worse.

Indian Passport- Awful for Travel:

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      Again, we love India and our roots are tied to India. Having said that again, Over this 4-5 years of travelling, the only few good things holding an Indian Passport is just collecting colorful visas and for people visiting Bhutan/ Nepal it’s a visa free entry. An Indian Passport needs a visa to enter almost all the countries in the world except for 50 countries roughly. With all the nationalities just swooping inside, we have to encounter the suspicious looks, showing our return flight tickets and our funds (??!!). It’s indeed an embarrassment. So I made a point that day. My kid should never ever suffer this.

PS:  My experience is not for everyone.  Though I try to see goodness in everything, this was way out of my acceptance.

(B) From Singapore:

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Singapore has given us numerous things. If it isn't Sg money, we could not have afforded staying at a beach front villa or visiting exotic countries or luxurious exclusive branded products or diamond jewelries. But among all these luxuries, relaxed lifestyle is not one of them.

We are done being ‘Foreign Talents’ for 5 years now. It’s high time we settle down, buy house, car, have kids. To do all this is Sg, it takes a minimum of 8-10 years from now, just for this. Forget the education system, the national service, the cost of living, ‘the tiny island- not so much to do’, and the work-life balance.  At the end of the day, life is nothing but a fast race here.

PS: I am sure all the foreign talents and the newly granted PR’s would agree.

Migration- Solution?

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      With all this being said, things aren't going to be rosy, out anywhere in the world. But giving it a try with hope isn't the worse thing.

Why Australia?

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      Every time I get back to India, my first few minutes have been great. The hugs at airport, the smile at faces, sure feels at home. But enough reasons mentioned for why we do not want to continue our lives there.

      First being comparatively easy and safe, affordable luxurious life style, high standards of living, relaxed and calm lifestyle (it’s kinda black mark when a person stays at office after office hours). This is just awesome for me because of my workaholic husband. Besides India is just hours away. It takes 10-12 hours from Chennai to Coimbatore in trains and almost the same time from Australia to India in Flights. Truly it’s no big deal.

It’s very obvious that we ourselves have to do laundry, clean toilet, mow the lawn, cook every day, drive my car and cannot even think of having maid, helpers, drivers, cleaners like an upper middle class family in India could afford. But this is far better than corruption and rapes.

And people who whine about the racist problems, “Stop complaining that the rose bush is full of thorns, be happy the thorn bush has roses”. The cast creed discrimination in India is no better than the racism in Australia.

The Steps, Processing time and all other details followed in Part 2.

Preethi s Kitchen - The Journey

I Hated kitchen. I Hated food. That was my childhood. I get angry when I feel hungry and tired and so I ate food just to keep my stomach half-full. Later, when I attended college, back at my cosy home in India, boiling water and heating coffee were the best I had achieved in kitchen. It had taken me 15 years to get out of my couch to do even that.

   Back then my whole family spent lots of time in the kitchen. My mom is a great cook. My brother (4 years younger!) among all other priorities, cooking was/is the first priority for him. He makes the best dishes @home. Among all the TV programmes kids watch, he always watches Dhamu’s cooking and other cooking programs. Cleaning and coffee comes under father’s department. I never went that side and no-one just cared.

   It was my mom who stuffed hot Idlis for breakfast into my mouth even at study holidays. And it was my brother who served me hot/neatly plated Gobi Manchurian for evening snack. It was my father who always woke me at 4 AM with his freshly brewed filter coffee. I just studied, studied hard (at least they thought so!) all the time.

    My mother never allowed me in the kitchen. She always said, “As long as there is something called stomach, there will always be hunger. And when there is hunger, you will always learn to cook”. So I finally graduated my Engineering successfully and got admit to masters at Nanyang Technological University, Singapore. The fever started then. Everyone bidding me goodbye, my friends, relatives, all the persons I know, I don’t know, started asking me one question. “Singapore huh! Self-cooking? ! !”. They never cared about my course, accommodation, but all I heard was cooking!

   Of 76 Kgs I carried, 50 Kgs was utensils, cooking powders and stuff. Not to mention my fiancé (then) and his friends whoever came to India, carried cooking stuffs for me. And I did not worry so much. I was staying with 3 other girls (very elder to me!) who told they were good in cooking and all I need to do was just take care of other things in the house-hold.

       That did not workout eventually. Lack of food made me angry/hungry. I was never able to concentrate on my studies. Of all the things I could possibly do, all I did was think, worry about food. No proper food almost put me to depression and created a deep hole in my focus. I started eating/grabbing food wherever I see and I went crazy on burgers, fries and coke. Out of nowhere came this huge weight gain. Thank heavens; my fiancé then pulled me out of these difficulties. Later I moved in with him and he took care of me from then.

      It was heaven and life became much simpler. He had regular office hours. I had evening classes. When I came home, dinner was readily served. Breakfast and Lunch was perfectly packed for the next day. Most importantly I finally realized how much I love food. “Necessity is the mother of everything” is so true, like my mother always quotes. I give all credits to my husband for have completed the masters. Though it was my parents who sent me here, without his moral support, I would have run back to India.

        Things turned out well. I landed in a job, got married and I decided it’s time to give back. I started cooking not just to impress my husband, but to thank him for the times he saved me. First the process was all random. I simply followed my husband’s technique. Put this -> Put that -> Get this -> Eat that. Though it was fun experimenting, I started learning in due course. Youtube, blogs, my mom, my mom-in-law were the great sources. Now there is nothing I cannot do. I love spending time in the kitchen cooking/baking (as long as it’s not 24/7 though). It just feels so divine, when the full-house smells of mint or thyme. And I am very glad that Arvind takes care of chopping and cleaning all the mess I make.

       I am very pleased to have a supporting husband and there is not a single meal so far he’s never appreciated and said “Thank u papa”. It so happens that my husband loves sea food and I am so allergic to it. But as a ‘thank you gift’ I wanted to surprise him with an exquisite seafood meal for his 3^rd anniversary at his 3^rd company. And that is how I took the next step. I borrowed utensils and cooked Salmon- A Gordon Ramsay recipe. For the love of god it turned out just awesome (he told me so!).

Kindly refer the YouTube link for his recipe.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jD9VJ92xyzA

So yes, I can cook pretty much anything. And all the NRI’s mom, please cool down (just like my mother did). Rushing the kid to cook will only draw him/her far from the kitchen. 

An Onam Sadya !

So this is my Kitchen Journey- From nowhere to somewhere.

Below is the Facebook link to the other few pictures I’ve cooked.

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10202812655310940&type=1&l=ed2ffeda86

The Wedding Season - Where the Worlds Perfectly fit each other !

Firstly, this post is no different from a regular-South-Indian-Tamil-Iyer wedding blog post. This is just an honest attempt of documenting our whole wedding experience, to show to our kids in the future. Now I might sound like an alarm bell, but our generation is at a risk of losing our rich cultural heritage and traditions (Not to mention the future generation!).

Thanks to my parents and the way I was brought-up (in spite of the little sacrifices made here and there when it came to aacharam & madi, as my mom is a working woman), I always wanted to sit on my dad’s lap, wear the Madisar, the whole Traditional Kemp set with Suryan-Chandran Pirai, Jimiki, Vangi, Bullaku etc., and get the Knot tied. And all credits to my In-Laws, they never stood in my way and were very supportive. Both our families had almost the same traditions, except for the very slight variations.

So our parents decided the dates and venue. We always wanted our wedding to be a fusion of modern and traditional elements. Since Arvind and me were in Singapore, going back and forth to India was not an option, we decided that our families back at home would plan the traditional part while we take care of the modern stuff. It all begun with a wedding book in which we had every little detail written down.

The Wedding Website:

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         Our Wedding website was something that kick-started our wedding activities. It was also a special experience, being the first activity that got Arvind and me sitting together – dreaming, planning and having fun. This had two motives. First, we had many friends and relatives outside India and scanning the invite and sending mail seemed old and inappropriate. Second, it was difficult to tell/brag our three year wonderful love story of how we met and who proposed (!). Below is the link for those who would like to look at our exciting journey.

http://weddingwire.com/preethiwedsarvind

Pre/Post Wedding Photo-shoot:

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          I am always known to be a photo-maniac. Wedding was not an exception. After an extensive research for over a year, we finally zeroed in on a team of professional wedding photographers. Though it was expensive, it was quite an experience worth every penny. This was when I realized, Arvind could pose so well, sometimes even better than me. So finally after 3 days of posing over 3000 amazing photos, we got many admirers, few annoyed, many jealous friends. At the end of the day, it was one awesome experience.

The Wedding Shopping:
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            The shopping experience was a very well planned and executed mission. I had a rehearsal for the wedding shopping itself and explored all the options. I knew exactly what to get, when to get and where to get. So we made a shopping plan, printed the time-table and gave everyone a copy. So it was a cakewalk with lots of laughter, food & bonding together as a family. It took half a day for Arvind’s purchase and the rest of the days covering mine, roaming around the streets of Chennai, not minding the hot weather.

Pre-Wedding Ceremony- Bride:
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Panda kaal, Viratham, Sumangali Prarthanai, Naandi:
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           So I arrived at Trichy, 5 days before wedding and it was like a festival with all the relatives at home. The Tamil- Brahmin wedding incorporates a number of pre-wedding rituals. So I had all the pre-wedding ceremonies including Panda Kaal, Viratham, Sumangali Prarthanai, Naandi.

          All the pre-wedding ceremonies came to an end and we started to the mandabam with a bang. Leaving home that time was very emotional for me as I finally got hold of the fact that when I return to my home, I won’t be that child-the nagging little girl who kept my parents on their toes for the silliest things possible anymore, but a married woman.

Pre-Wedding Ceremony- Groom:
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       Arvind arrived at his home @ Chennai, 3 days prior to wedding. Arvind also had the same set of pre-wedding rituals, in addition, he also had a poonal ceremony.

Poonal:  From being a boy to becoming a man. (Still Arvind asks me “Do I look like a boy” ?!!! all the time). A sacred thread is worn and Gayathri mantra is pronounced. No thread, No wife. This thread is the passport for the marriage.

The Engagement/ Nichyadartham:
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          So after welcoming Arvind’s family, we all got ready for the ceremony. We never had a formal engagement prior to the wedding. The day before the wedding was our so-called engagement ceremony. Rather than being a formal function it was more of a dressed rehearsal for me, with all the long-fake hair, the heavy sarees, the make-up and Arvind wearing kurta and long-pointed shoes for the first time. It was all about blushing and posing for photos. Of course the Lagna pathrikai was read!

There was no Jaanavaasam, as Arvind is a shy boy ! :P

Below is the 2-minute video of our Varaverpu (Groom Bride Welcome Ceremony).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OcUoge4k7ck&feature=youtu.be

The Wedding:
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Mangala Snanam, The Kasi Yatrai, The Maalai Mathal, The Oonjal, The Kanyadaanam, The Muhurtham, The Saptapadi:
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        The engagement was over and we never really slept that night with all the excitement and everyone running here and there. We had an early morning Muhurtham. So after the Mangala snanam, we bathed around 4 Am. Arvind went for his Kasi Yatrai (with Arvind running away and my father pleading to come back and marry me- Yeah right :P !). We then had the exchange of garlands and Oonjal, where we were over fed with milk and bananas & ladoos flying over our heads and hitting the bald heads around with the kids & cousins singing “kodhai maalai matthinal”.

A 3 minute video of our Mangala snanam is below!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3Uny4b-VkQ&feature=youtu.be

          After the kanyadanam, with lots of happy tears witnessing around, Arvind tied the knot at last and we became THE MR & MRS.

       After the Metti function and the marriage registration, everybody finally left us alone for lunch, we really never cared about food then. Then came the sudden rush of posing creatively. We posed with Autos, Nadhaswarams, creating a lot of drama in the venue.

                   

Post-Wedding Ceremony:
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The Nagavalli:
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          This is a Tamil-Telegu Fusion wedding. Normal weddings would have ended in around 2-3 hours. But ours was an 8-hour ceremony. This was the final fire ceremony with lots of decorated colourful pots around us. And Arvind tied the knot again. This was the first time I ever spoke in Telegu.

The Grahapravesam & The Nalangu:
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           Finally our parents showed us some food. So after all the chaos with no food for almost 9 hours and all the fire around was over, I finally thought, I could get some time alone with Arvind, my husband. But once the lunch was over, our families dragged us apart back to our separate rooms. After a few hours of good rest and head massage (thanks to my cousins!) we got dressed again, finished the Grahapravesam and then started the Nalangu. We were so nervous, embarrassed, felt awkward and blushed. They made us do all the funny stuff including rolling coconuts, breaking appalams, made us sing, dance, and made us really really tired.

Our Nalangu ritual-An 8 minute video below !

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oE_SLlSdeQg&feature=youtu.be

The Reception:
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           We - The newlywed couple finally arrived at Arvind’s place @ Chennai. The Reception was a grand affair held at Green Park - One of the most beautiful locations in Chennai. I wore a Red Designer Saree with my wedding Louboutins. The saree is as heavy as it looks (At least 4 Kgs!). Arvind was all suited up in a White Attire. We had the backdrops, the garlands, the venue, designed to match our clothes.

           Thank heavens, no ceremonies @ Reception. Just all the friends & relatives with great food, fun, snow sprays, cakes, kids and laughter.

      Then came the real exciting part- Opening all the gifts! The first session was opening the wedding gifts @ my home, in Trichy and the second session was @ Arvind’s place, in Chennai. We chose the real good ones and took back to our home @Sg.

The Wedding Teaser:
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            When a friend looking at our photos, cracked a joke on why we wouldn’t have a trailer for our wedding movie. Well! We decided why we shouldn’t and thus came the Wedding Teaser.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYwM08VFEJk

The Wedding Film:
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           In seven minutes and twenty seconds – were captured all of the rhythm, warmth, love, tears, joy, happiness, nervousness, energy, excitement, embraces, expressions- and truly told the story of  Preethi & Arvind. Filtered through hours and hours of footage, edited it perfectly to the catchy tune- presenting our wedding film.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0aHeEXHhrA

The Bridal Wedding Gown & The Suite: The First Anniversary Present:
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         It was my childhood fantasy to wear the white-bridal wedding gown. So that came as a surprise first anniversary present from my darling husband. Before getting all the tan@ the amazing beaches of Bali, we went for the photo-shoot at many stunning locations @ SG. Along with the photo-shoot package came the additional gift of a diamond couple wedding rings.

                

Stepping into the 6^th year:
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         Three years in love and two lovely years after the wedding-Several thousand kilometres of travels- 8 countries visited – One awesome pet Jaangri- Hundreds of gifts- Hundreds of fights- Hundreds of make ups-Exploring Cuisines- Experimenting culinary at home- Hundreds of movies- Several hundred hours of roaming-Shopping- Thousands of lovely moments.

Thus ended our splendid wedding experience which will remain in our hearts forever.

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The Ceremonies of a Traditional Brahmin Wedding:
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      Listed here are the major ceremonies with brief explanation of a Tamil-Brahmin Wedding, excluding the other small ritual details.

Disclaimer: Few explanations are not in my words.

Source: Internet

Pre-Wedding Ceremonies:
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Panda kaal:This is done to ensure that the wedding preparations proceed without any hassle.

(1) Viratham: Fasting is performed by the bride, groom, both the families, and vedic hymns are chanted by the vaadiyar in front of the fire. This ritual is performed to invoke the blessings of the ancestors and the almighty.

(2) Sumangali Prarthanai: We had all the married ladies at my home to bless me with a happy married life. Not to mention the awesome food!

(3) Naandi:  Naandi was conducted to honor the Pithrus (ancestors) and seek their blessings for a long and prosperous life. The ceremony is conducted by Brahmins, who are presented with gifts and sweets. Families seek the blessings of their ancestors, to ensure that the wedding is carried on smoothly.

(4) Poonal: From being a boy to becoming a man. A sacred thread is worn and Gayathri mantra is pronounced. No thread, No wife. This thread is the passport for the marriage.

(5) Maaplai Azhaipu/Jaanavasam: The Groom’s family is greeted and welcomed warmly by the Bride’s parents and offerings are made.

(6) The Nichyadartham/ The Engagement: The Lagna Pathrikai is read by the vaadiyar, announcing the details related to marriage, including the muhurtham and the venue. This is followed by aarti and mouth-watering lavish dinner.

The Wedding-day Ceremonies:
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(7) Mangala Snanam: On the dawn of the wedding day, after applying oil in the hair and kungumam in the forehead, the bride and the groom take the holy bath and get ready for the wedding.

(8) Kasi Yatrai: The groom pretends that he leaves for kasi, not interested in taking responsibilities for house hold. He is stopped by the bride’s father and persuades him to marry his daughter.

(9) The Maalai Mathal & The Oonjal: After the groom enters the pandal, he exchanges garlands for three times with the bride. This ceremony is full of fun and frolic. Thereafter, they are seated together on a swing. Married women give the newlyweds spoonful of milk and banana pieces to eat.

(10) The Kanyadanam & The Muhurtham: The groom is considered as god. The bride’s father washes his feet, mother puts kajal in his eyes, brother wears the garland. The bride is given a nine yard saree. The sister-in-laws and aunts help her to tie the saree and the bride is asked to sit on her father’s lap and the groom ties two knots of a sacred yellow thread. The third knot is tied by the groom's sister. The three knots symbolize the union of the mind, spirit and body.

(11) Saptapadi : The bridegroom takes his wife's right hand in his left hand and leads her around the holy fire for seven times. In every round, she touches her feet to the grindstone hoping that their union will be firm forever.

Post-Wedding Ceremonies:
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(12) Sammandhi Mariyathai: The families of the newly wed couple exchange gifts and clothes, to mark the culmination of the wedding.

(13) Laaja Homam & Paaladaanam: The bride's brother offers popped rice to the groom, which he offers to the holy fire. By doing this, the couple seeks the blessings of Agni that represents the divine power and light of God.
As a part of Paaladaanam custom, the couple seeks the blessings of the elderly members of the family by touching their feet.

(14) Grihapravesham: After the completion of wedding ceremony, the bride is taken to her husband's house. Aarti is performed to welcome the newly married couple, as they stand at the doorstep to enter the home. Thereafter, a lavish feast is served at the wedding venue.

(15) Nalangu: The evening of the marriage day is the time to relax and play. The newly wed wife calls her husband for play, inviting him through a song, followed by a series of playful games. The bride anointing the groom’s feet with colour paste, fanning him, showing him a mirror, breaking papads over each other’s head, wrenching the betel pack from each other’s hands, rolling the coconut from one to another as in playing ball and so on. During these events the women sing songs, making fun of the bride and the groom.

Paal, Pazham is given and aarti is taken on all occasions whenever the couple enters any venue together.